Is there such a thing as too much plastic surgery? I think so, and I think I have a few questions celebrities might want to ask themselves before embarking on that next trip to the doctor, inspired by this photo of Fergie over on A Socialite’s Life. I’ve created it as a form letter, for ease of use. Just circle any appropriate items and send to a celebrity you care about. Think of it as a public service.
Dear Celebrity,
Please reconsider your upcoming plastic surgery for the following reason(s):
- You’ve started to resemble the drag queens that imitate you.
- People are posting parody photos of you on Fark - unedited.
- You landed the lead in Transamerica 2, only because makeup costs would be so low.
- Your makeup routine includes items found at The Home Depot.
- Joan Rivers is jealous of you.
- The work “alien” has been used to describe your look.
- Your plastic surgeon just named the new wing in his office after you.
- People pass you on the street and say “Was that Michael Jackson?”
- The stitches from your last surgery haven’t been removed yet.
- Other: _________________________
You get the idea. Sometimes too much is enough. Age gracefully - and that includes men. Or at least wait until medical advances won’t leave you looking like you came from Roswell.
Sincerely,
Celebrity Wonk and
(your name here)